I use to be the type of gal who wanted to be friends with everyone. I always played nice and sucked it up even when people treated me sub par. However, more recently, I have made a conscious decision to carefully choose who I spend my time with and how I convey the way I want to be treated as a friend, co-worker, sibling, daughter, writer, and all of the other hats that we all wear each day.
I have come to the conclusion that negativity and narrow-mindedness make me run for the hills. I choose to disengage from people with these traits and say “sayonara” to better benefit my health and open-minded kind of nature.
On this topic, assertiveness comes to mind. It is a personality trait that packs a lot of power. It is a trait that some people have mastered and others squirm with. It is a work in progress for me, but the more I am assertive, the more I find happiness because I articulate exactly what I want, feel, and need. It cuts straight to the chase and nixes the BS. It’s a Beautiful thing.
The individuals who waver, take a back seat, and don’t say a peep suffer. They don’t get what they want and they may spend days, weeks, and even years struggling to articulate exactly what they have been feeling. This may be seen in marriages, workplaces, and even as you as your reading this blog deciding to disagree or agree with what I have to say (the assertive ones challenge my views, compliment my work, and challenge me to continue writing or throw in the towel…it’s all encouragement thank you very much!)
I am not going to bore you and get all emo about life choices, but for heaven’s sake take a stance! Be loud about what you want. Be quiet when the timing is right and DO NOT let anyone take away your freedom to choose.
A few things I have learned in 26 years:
- I am freakishly active and thrive on it
- I am a natural perfectionist and it takes all of my power “to let things go”
- Control is my enemy, I like to have it, but benefit when I don’t
- The outdoors fuels me
- Church makes me feel whole
- Writing is not a choice, it’s a must
- Creativity is my gift…numbers of any sort are not
- Intellectual conversation stimulates me and reality shows and stupid banter makes me sick
- I get people, sometimes, without exchanging words
- Culture is f’ing fabulous
- Farmers markets make my innards dance: good food, cool people, and the outdoors? Ummmmm ELLO?!
What have you learned about yourself? How assertive are you? Get jiggy wit’ it and share!